Every day, before stepping outside into the world, I put on a mask. Well, it’s not the actual mask, but the different personalities that I wear to survive through the noise, expectations, and unpredictability of the day.
There are some days when I have to be pretentious that I’m an Achiever, always smiling and saying “I have got this,” even when I don’t. I show up, take charge, and say yes, and I act as though the pressure doesn’t weigh me down.
And then there are other days, I have to put on the Peacemaker’s mask, remaining kind and soft-spoken even when my chest tightened with unsaid words. I have to play the “cool and calm” card to avoid being perceived as too much, laugh at offensive jokes, and nod in agreement with things I disagree with.
Sometimes, I become the Entertainer, making jokes during awkward silences and being “the OG fun person to have around.” Because if people are laughing, they might not notice that I’m feeling anxious, exhausted, or otherwise not okay.
And then there are days when I end up ghosting people. I start ignoring calls, put texts on read, and cancel plans the very last minute. I disappear not out of rudeness, but because I need to breathe without being watched, judged, or expected to be anything.
The truth is that these masks aren’t fake; they are little pieces of who I am. But they’re not the whole story. I put them on to protect and defend myself. To adjust. To gain acceptance. Because the world can feel like a stage at times, and I like to act rather than merely exist.
However, with time, I have realised the danger of staying under the mask for too long. You forget ‘THE REAL YOU’. You confuse protection with personality. You shrink your truth to fit into someone else’s idea of you.
Now, I’m learning to gently take them off. To sit with my rawness. To admit that I’m not okay today, without guilt. To let silence exist without filling it. To show up not as a polished character, but as an honest version of myself, full of chaos.
Because being real and authentic isn’t about being one version of yourself, it’s about allowing all parts of you to be seen, even the ones that don’t smile on cue.
All of us are wearing masks. However, we also deserve to know who we are without them.